You're pregnant. Now what?

Last Updated on Wednesday, 07 April 2010 13:14

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Everyone who is pregnant has choices and decisions to make.

You may have many different feelings. If this is an unplanned pregnancy you may find it difficult to decide what to do. Sometimes, no option will feel completely right – just the best in the circumstances. But you do need to act quickly in order to keep all your options open to you.

Before you make a decision you may want to talk to someone else (or a number of people) you can trust and who will listen to you. This could be your partner, a friend, your parents or someone in your whanau. Counsellors, doctors and nurses can also be very helpful. You should expect your talk with any doctor or counsellor to be confidential. If you feel unsure, check first. Whoever you talk to should not make you feel bad about what has happened. They should not tell you what to do.

Whatever your age, you have the legal right to choose what you want to do. Try not to rush your decision. The following choices are available to you:

Parenting your child - you may want to share the responsibility of looking after your child with your partner or family. You may decide to care for the child by yourself. But raising a child is a challenge. If you are worried about finances, Work and Income New Zealand can tell you if you can get an allowance or benefit.

Guardianship - is an arrangement between the birth parents and the caregivers. This is a legal arrangement to decide who has custody and responsibility for raising your child. Guardianship is usually within families.

Adoption – giving up a baby for adoption isn’t easy – for the mother or father. It is a legal process. The rights and responsibilities of parenting are transferred from the birth parent(s) to adoptive parents. An open adoption is when the birth parent(s) and the adoptive family both agree to have continued contact. To find out more about adoption click here to go to the adoption section on the Child, Youth and Family Services website.

Abortion – is an operation where the pregnancy is terminated (ended). This is a deeply personal issue, based on what feels right for the individual involved. No one should push you into having an abortion. There are laws surrounding abortion. The laws take into account the circumstances of the woman or girl and the length of time she has been pregnant.